“MEA CULPA” - 3 LIFE LESSONS LEARNED WHILE FLYING BY THE SEAT OF MY PANTS

I have received a note from my blogger page indicating we have had over 20,000 views of my  little blog.  They suggested I start including advertising.  I hate blog advertising.  As you read a story, an ad pops up… you have to stop, delete it and sometimes get redirected anyway.

I thought instead, I would try a trial run with the old style advertising as used in the early days of radio and TV.  This is where the product was actually introduced in the story…such as, with Matt Dillon in the old “Gunsmoke” series.  “You know Chester, we may be up here in these rocks a long time, waiting  for the Ned Logan outlaw gang to return to their hideout.  It’s a good thing we have these flavorful L&M cigarettes with us.  Ah, (inhales) great tobacco taste and all the flavor of the old west.  A real smoke, my smoke, Matt Dillon, U.S. Marshall and loyal L&M cigarette lawman”.

If there are a number of viewers, I will bill the mentioned products and see if they will pay.  To me, this is more creative, in better taste and more effective than a popup.   We will see and I will keep you advised…and now on with the story…

     I was hired by Melvin Simon and Associates in the fall of 1972 and moved away from my hometown of Sherman, Texas.  For the next 41 years I toiled in the shopping center industry, while learning an awful lot about myself, people and life.  It was a never ending party of educational episodes and revelation!

     I read an interview with Willie Nelson and he was asked if he could, would he go back and speak to his younger self and what would he say?  His response was, “Yeah…SHUT UP”.  This would be applicable to me.  Throughout my life I was often the “Enfant Terrible”.  I talked WAY too much, often saying things without thinking them through, sometimes in an attempt to be funny…which I have come to realize is a safety mechanism.  

     One memorable “foot in the mouth” episode occurred in the mid-70’s while I was in marketing at Simon.  That year the company sponsored a car in the Indianapolis 500.  We had a number of promotions tied into the Muscular Dystrophy Association and the car had Melvin Simon and Associates/Jerry Lewis Telethon painted on the side.  Several of us in the department went to the track to watch the car in practice, along with several cases of Budweiser. (Ed McMahon was our corporate spokesman, along with Budweiser.)   

     As we were imbibing, a colleague, Sandra Brock, (now Sandra Cline) joined the group.  She was miffed after visiting a bank and was told even though she was making good money and had excellent credit, they would not provide the loan she sought because she was an unmarried woman.  She was shaking her head and wondered how long we would remain in the dark ages.  (Now, in my defense, I had consumed a number of Budweiser’s…beechwood aged for that great taste beer lovers savor…Budweiser, the King of Beers.)  I said, “You know Sandy, that is a shame.  As for me, I think of women as regular people.”   …  Even as the words passed my ever-so-gently inebriated lips, I knew while attempting to express my support and sympathy, I had made a major blunder.     

     To her ever lasting credit, Sandy looked at me for a long moment… opened her purse and took out a pack of Salem menthol cigarettes.  (Salem for that great, naturally refreshing feel of a cool spring meadow…Salem, a smooth, relaxing smoke.)  She lit a cigarette,  turned away and said in a low tone, “You are better than this and I am going to forget you said it…however, I think you have had enough beer.”    I thanked her and breathed a sigh of relief and thanksgiving.  I made a mental note to keep my yap shut and not attempt to appear to be articulate on a sensitive issue, such as equal rights …especially when indulging in the King of Beers.

     Another of my famous faux pax’s involved my friend Becky Maccardini.  At this time Becky was President of our trade organization, The International Council of Shopping Centers.  She and her husband, Reno, had arrived for the Las Vegas convention, after attending another industry event in a distant country.  They had serious jet lag, had to attend another dinner, and after very little in the way of libation, made their way to their room, barely undressed and fell into a deep coma of sleep.  Becky awakened in their darkened room, went to the bathroom and turned on the light.   To her horror, her reflected image revealed a serious, black blemish down the side of her face.  Becky’s immediate thought was, “This is what I get…I am too rough on my body, I am not getting enough rest…I am drinking wine and not eating properly.  These irregular hours and poor diet are taking their toll and I am paying the

price.”  She edged near the mirror for closer inspection and discovered she had fallen asleep on the Godiva Chocolate, lovingly placed on her pillow by the house keeping staff.  (Becky thought, “Godiva Chocolate…the finest chocolate for the discriminating candy lover, available in a variety of convenient gift packages”).

     Becky was gratefully relieved and prepared for the day.   She ran into me downstairs and relayed the story of how she thought she had ruined her face through poor nutrition, wine and a lack of reasonable hours.  I laughed myself to tears and for the rest of the day I shared the story with all our mutual friends.   At the end of the day I saw Becky once again.  She smiled and said, “It doesn’t really matter, but everyone I ran into today shared the story I told you this morning and said they heard it from you.  Now, just because someone doesn’t tell you to be discrete over a shared tale, is no reason to feel you can repeat it to others.  If it needs to be told, let them tell it.”  

     TOUCHE’…she was right.   It was a great story, a once in a lifetime epic event and if it needed to be told, she would tell it… just as she told it to me.    Lesson learned.  (By the way…I asked Becky if I could share this story and the lesson imparted…she agreed.)

     Perhaps the greatest business lesson I ever learned was an event that occurred shortly after I joined The Limited stores in ’83.  The Limited had a number of divisions and I was responsible for the store’s real estate in the south.  We were rolling out our new concepts called Express and Victoria’s Secret, with generally successful results.  One exception was my favorite shopping center of all time, North Park Center in Dallas.  The owners are very nice, polite people and explained they wanted unique tenants for their center and it appeared Express and Victoria’s were going to be found everywhere.  Why would they want a shop found in every other center in Dallas?  Their rationalization sounded very reasonable and I was stumped.  I was based in Dallas (in a one man office…just me) and called my boss in Columbus, Ohio, where our corporate headquarters were located.  I explained my problem and asked if he could come to Dallas and help in my appeal to North Park’s ownership.

     His answer was the best piece of business advice I have ever received and it changed my life.

     He said,  “I could do that, but then I would have to ask myself…WHAT DO I NEED YOU FOR?”  

 (In a loud Keith Jackson voice), WHOA, NELLIE!  This is the best thing he could have done for me. 

 By relying on myself, I had to figure it out.  We had to have a unique answer for the best shopping center in Dallas.  ( “North Park Mall, number one in Metro-plex shopping and number one in your heart”.)

     We answered their need for a unique shopping experience by designing and building a special/souped up store with Victoria’s/Express/Limited stores in one, classic presentation.  We designed something to be found no where outside of New York and it worked.  We made the deal by figuring out their needs, rather than just our own and this happened because it “HAD” to be figured out.

     I learned in order to be a good deal maker, “YOU” had to figure it out and think outside the box.  Just as being a good leader means, letting go of the rope.  Make suggestions, but the troops have to make it happen…be supportive, but allow them figure it out.  Be it your employees or your kids…this is the only way they grow.  (Speaking of growth, it’s the time of year to begin planting your garden with Kinky Friedman Seeds…”KINKY”,  for all your gubernatorial or agricultural needs!)